The show kicks off with Michael Cole and Jerry Lawler welcoming us to the 2011 Slammy Awards. The Slammy for “Tell Me I Did Not See That Moment.” Booker T comes out first, followed by Hornswoggle, who now has an afro. The nominees are:
- Jim Ross dancing during the Michael Cole challenge
- Santino’s near-win at the Royal Rumble.
- R-Truth blaming Little Jimmy for not winning the WWE title against John Cena.
- The Miz impersonating The Rock.
The winner is: Jim Ross. Out comes Jim Ross, flanked by Eve and Alicia Fox. Ross said he never imagined he’d win a Slammy Award for “Getting jiggy” – but he was interrupted by Michael Cole. #SlammyAwards is now trending on Twitter. Cole runs down Jim Ross for being proud of his dancing. Booker T came to JR’s rescue – and said tonight, JR will challenge Michael Cole in a rap-off. They go to the ring and begin. Booker T says Michael Cole will go first. Cole says he’s not scared, because he listens to Eminem. Cole goes first and does a typical rap battle – trashing JR, talking himself up – all while looking lie a complete idiot.
Booker T says not bad, but now it’s JR’s turn. JR gets out a few lines, but then bombs pretty bad. He had a hard time coming up with rhymes, and told Cole to kiss his ass, because he’s not a rapper. Booker T asks the crowd to decide who did better. JR, despite his choke on the mic, gets a huge pop while Cole gets booed. JR wins. Cole leaves the ring – but Booker T wants to keep JR in there for something. Booker T wants JR to do the spinaroonie. Booker T goes first, followed by JR, who does a pretty good spinaroonie.
They show the nominees for Superstar of the Year – John Cena, The Miz, Mark Henry, CM Punk, Alberto Del Rio and Orton
Hardcore legend Mick Foley is shown backstage. He’ll be presenting the next Slammy.
Out comes WWE Hall of Famer Ted DiBiase and Mick Foley – to DiBiase’s music. DiBiase steals Foley’s gimmick of shouting out the local town. Foley references his “thriftiness” and DiBiase talks about being an ordained minister. Here are the nominees for “Holy $h*t Moment of the Year”:
- Sheamus’s Powerbomb on Sin Cara through a ladder
- Randy Orton giving Christian and RKO on the ring steps
- Big Show and Mark Henry collapsing the ring
- Evan Bourne doing Air Bourne off the top of a ladder onto WWE superstars
The winners are: Big Show and Mark Henry. Big Show accepts the award for both men. Big Show says the World Heavyweight championship would go great with his Slammy.
Big Show says he’s going to the ring now to do what he does best – kick some ass. Big Show will face Wade Barrett comes out and we cut to commercial. We’re back. The big men brawl and take it to the outside. There’s a table set up. Barrett attacks Show and lays him on the table. Barrett goes to the apron and climbs the turbuckles, but Big Show gets up before Barrett can jump. Big Show breaks the table with two hand strikes. Barett goes at Big Show with a chair, but Big Show punches the chair, leading to Barrett getting disqualified. Barrett flees and Big Show celebrates. We go to commercial.
Former WWE tag team champion and newly signed WWE producer the Road Dogg Jesse James comes out to present the next Slammy for “Pipe Bomb of the Year.” Road Dogg does some rapping and does his old DX ring intro routine. They showed a long reel of crazy moments from the previous year, with no real nominees named. The winner is our WWE Champion, CM Punk.
Out comes Punk with a mannequin wearing a blonde wig and a Dynamic Dudes t-shirt. Punk then throws it to a video package looking at the career of John Laurinaitis – including some hilarious footage of Laurinaitis’ wrestling career from the late 80’s and early 90s. This video is epic – we’ll have it up here on the site as soon as its online. Some great mic work from Punk.
Later tonight, it will be CM Punk and Randy Orton vs. The Miz and Alberto Del Rio.
We get a promo for tomorrow night’s Tribute to the Troops special.
Up next is “Divalicious Moment of the Year” – which will be presented by one of the most influential divas in WWE history – Lita. Lita says it’s nice that they remembered her and talks about her career accomplishments. This year’s nonimees are:
- Natalya’s double sharpshooter
- Kelly Kelly winning the Divas championship
- Kharma attacks Michelle McCool
- Beth Phoenix beats Eve with a top rope Glam Slam for the Divas championship
The winner is: Kelly Kelly. She receives her award and then out come Beth Phoenix and Natalya. Phoenix grabs the Slammy from Kelly, Kelly slaps her and takes it back and the Divas of Doom run off.
We get a WWE ’12 video clip previewing the match later tonight between Mark Henry and John Cena.
Up next is the Slammy for “OMG Moment of the Year,” presented by Santino and the Bella Twins.
- Triple H Tombstones The Undertaker at WrestleMania
- Rock Bottom on John Cena at WrestleMania
- Superstars walk out on Triple H
- CM Punk Takes the WWE Championship At Money in the Bank
The winner is: Triple H tombstoning The Undertaker at WrestleMania. Triple H comes out with a sledgehammer and walks right to the ring without accepting the award. Triple H does his ring entrance and poses in the crowd, showing the WWE Universe and Kevin Nash that he’s back. Triple H grabs the mic and says the OMG moment wasn’t what he tombstoned the Undertaker – it’s that The Undertaker could not leave the ring under his own power after their match. Only one man walked out – and it was him. 9 months later, the Dead Man is no more. He turned his attention to Kevin Nash and replayed footage of Nash’s sledge hammer attack on him from RAW several weeks ago. Triple H ran down Nash and said he will get his revenge this Sunday at TLC.
Out come David Otunga and WWE Hall of Famer Tony Atlas to present “Trending Star of the Year.” Otunga starts talking, but Tony Atlas just laughs in his face. He asks Atlas to stop, but he won’t. The four nominees will compete in a fatal fourway match tonight. He asks what’s so funny – and Atlas says he’s laughing at him. Here are nominees:
- Cody Rhodes
- Daniel Bryan
- Dolph Ziggler
- Zack Ryder
Out first is Zack Ryder, followed by Cody Rhodes, Daniel Bryan and United States champion Dolph Ziggler (with Vickie Guerrero). They hype Ryder vs. Ziggler this Sunday at TLC. The match begins and all 4 men go at it. Ziggler and Rhodes wind up on the outside and Ryder and Bryan do tandem dives on the heels. Apparently the competitor who trends first on Twitter is the Slammy winner. Daniel Bryan and Zack Ryder now going at it. Cody slides in and attempts a pin on both fallen men. Back in comes Ziggler and the heel champions are staring each other down. All 4 men go at it again and the heels are dominating. Ryder is out of the ring and both men double team Daniel Bryan. They take turns on Bryan before they can no longer co-exist and get in each others faces. Great action, with Cody Rhodes the only man standing as we go to commercial.
Daniel Bryan and Zack Ryder are currently trending, not sure who trended worldwide first.
Cody Rhodes and Zack Ryder are in the ring when we come back. Ryder gains control and does “woo woo woo,” but gets a clothesline from Ziggler on the apron. Ziggler stomps down Ryder and goes for a neckbreaker, which is reversed into a pinfall attempt. He gets 2. Daniel Bryan goes for a sunset flip but gets 2, Ziggler, Ryder and Bryan triple clothesline each other and all men are down. Cody Rhodes does a crazy off-the-second-rope kick to Ziggler’s face. Daniel Bryan goes on the warpath on Cody Rhodes, kicking the hell out of him in the corner. Bryan goes for a running knee to Rhodes’ face and then goes up top. Rhodes knocks him off the turnbuckle. Ziggler misses a stinger splash on Ryder in the opposite corner. Ryder goes up top, but Ziggler stop him. Ziggler and Rhodes do superplexes to the faces at almost the exact same time. Very cool spot. Ziggler and Rhodes are slugging it out. Rhodes throws Zack Ryder up, who turns it into a Ruff Ryder to Ziggler, Cross Rhodes on Ryder. Bryan puts the Labell lock on Rhodes, but Ziggler puts the sleeper on Bryan. Bryan breaks free – but gets hit with the Zig Zag. Dolph gets the pin.
Jerry Lawler comes out with an envelope to see who won Trending Star of the Year. The winner of the Slammy is – Zack Ryder! Ryder accepts the award, but gets nailed with a Zig Zag by Ziggler. Ziggler holds the Slammy above his head while Vickie makes a “baby crying” hand motion at Ryder. Ziggler takes off with the US title, Ryder’s Slammy and Vickie.
Christian comes out with a neck brace and on crutches to present “Game Changer of the Year.” Christian asks how he’s not nominated for this award – or Superstar of the Year – when he won 2 world championships in the past year. Christian blames the WWE Universe for not standing up to him and demanding he get what he deserves – one more match for the WWE championship. He introduces the nominees:
- Vince McMahon Being Removed From Power by Triple H
- Edge’s Retirement Speech
- Kevin Nash attacking CM Punk at SummerSlam and allowing Del Rio to cash in MITB
- The Rock challenges John Cena to a match at WM28
The winner is: The Rock challenges John Cena to the main event of WrestleMania. Cena comes out to accept the award, because The Rock sure ain’t there. Cena actually says he can’t accept the award himself – he’s going to bring out the other man responsible, The Rock. Cena introduces The Rock, who isn’t there. Cena apologizes and acts surprised The Rock and his assistant Brian aren’t there. Cena says The Rock is here via satellite. He points us to the big screen, but there’s no satellite footage from The Rock. Cena says this is worse than JR’s rap. Cena says he’ll be at his best when he faces The Rock at WrestleMania. Cena says this will be the biggest WrestleMania ever – and he and The Rock will change the game forever on April 1st.
Footage is shown from last week’s TLC contract signing, with CM Punk going ape sh*t on Alberto Del Rio and John Laurinaitis. Ricardo Rodriguez introduces Alberto Del Rio comes out in a $200,000 1960 Rolls Royce. Out next is his partner, The Miz. Randy Orton comes out followed by the WWE Champion, CM Punk. The crowd is chanting for CM Punk as Punk and Miz start off. Punk in control and he tags into Orton. Orton in control. Miz tags in Del Rio, who goes to work on Orton. Miz chokes Orton while Del Rio distracts the ref. Cole argues that Del Rio should be Superstar of the Year. He won the largest Royal Rumble in history, won MITB and his biggest accomplishment – he’s trending worldwide on Twitter right now. Very good 5-10 minutes of action, with all men getting ring time. Wade Barrett comes out and attacks Randy Orton, leaving Punk alone against Miz and Del Rio. Punk went for GTS but Miz reversed it and hit the Skull Crushing Finale for the 3-count on the WWE champion.
The heels bring out a ladder and use it to attack CM Punk. Michael Cole reminds us this is all legal on Sunday. Del Rio and Miz take turns attacking Punk. Del Rio puts his arm bar on Punk while Miz talks trash to him on the mic. Miz says they’re not going to hurt him too bad tonight, because they want him in good shape for Sunday – but Punk is really selling Del Rio’s submission hold. Miz yells at Punk and says his title reign is over this Sunday.
Michael Cole idiotically said he was going to show us on his iPad that he’s voting for The Miz for Superstar of the Year. Cole actually voted for Orton and it registered. It was clearly shown on camera that Cole voted for Orton, but he sold it like he correctly clicked the Miz button.
Another Kane Resurrected promo aired.
A promo aired for the WWE Network – and it appears WWE Hall of Famer Mene Gene is the first person who will be on Legends House.
Vickie Guerrero and Goldust come out to present the award for “A Lister of the Year.” Goldust says Vickie deserves an award tonight – for wearing more makeup that him.
- The Muppets
- Cee Lo Green
- Hugh Jackman
- Snooki
The Slammy goes to – Snooki. We go to a prerecorded message of Snooki, who is holding her Slammy Award. She thanks her fans in the WWE Universe, gets in a plug for Jersey Shore and wishes her fellow guido Zack Ryder luck at TLC.
Josh Matthews is backstage with Mark Henry. Mark Henry says if Big Show thought what he did to him before, he ain’t seen nothing yet. He’ll beat the Big Show this Sunday – and tonight, he’s going to destroy John Cena for getting in his business. Tonight, Cena gets inducted into the Hall of Pain.
Here to present the Slammy for Superstar of the Year – Rey Mysterio. The nominees are:
- Randy Orton
- The Miz
- CM Punk
- Alberto Del Rio
- Mark Henry
- Alberto Del Rio
The winner is: CM Punk. Out comes John Laurinaitis. Ace says because CM Punk is currently in no condition to accept this award, so he’ll accept it on his behalf. Laurinaitis celebrates with the Slammy.
Mark Henry is shown walking backstage and we cut to the latest “It Begins” video.
World Heavyweight champion Mark Henry is first out to the ring. John Cena’s music hits, Cena salutes the ring and runs down the ramp.
Mark Henry begins the match by throwing Cena around and showing off his power. We cut to commercial. Back to the match – and Henry is still formly in control. King accidentally calls Henry “Zack Henry” – which gets a big laugh out of Cole. Cena goes for a slam on Henry, but Henry is too heavy and falls on Cena. Cena eventually regains control and nails Henry with the 5 knuckle shuffle. He goes for the AA but Henry’s weight is once again too much for him. Henry gets a 2 count on a badly beat up Cena. Henry’s got his boon on Cena’s throat in the corner. Henry hoists Cena up, who manages to escape and lands a flurry of punches on the champion. He runs off the ropes and nails Henry. He goes for another attack but winds up in a bear hug. Henry is squeezing the life out of John Cena. Cena breaks Henry’s grip, but gets hit with the World’s Strongest Slam.
Fireworks go off and we have the return of … KANE! KANE comes out in a new mask and chokeslams John Cena! Kane is back as RAW goes off the air.
WE WILL HAVE PICTURES OF KANE’s NEW MASK ONLINE IN 10 MINUTES – STAY TUNED!!
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